535. FEEL, WRITE, SHARE

Once I start I cannot stop. Between work, volunteering, ordering in take-out, spin classes, I write and write and write. The only other break I take from writing is to call my parents, my brother, Tate, Ainsley, Siobhan and Meera. But then I go back to writing into the wee hours of the night, into the early morning. There have been times when I finish a post as the first glimmer of day breaks. But I am committed to posting five times a week. Originally, I had hoped to post daily, but I could not keep up that pace.

At times the writing is electric, alive and on fire, just pouring out of my head and heart and soul through my fingers. For the things I cannot remember, I have my journals and souvenirs (museum maps, text messages, admission tickets). I often am surprised by my memory. The dates I can remember, the conversations that I have had. I am reminded of joy and pain I have forgotten but chronicled in little pieces of paper, scraps tucked here and there in books and files. And I piece, piece the story, my story together one post at a time.

For hours upon endless hours I sit and type.  I have not mapped out the story per se. I have mapped out what I want to share. I have never thought about the timeline, like how many posts will I post. I wonder if anyone will, read, why they will read. If one person reads, if a few people can relate, that would be more than enough. I know I cannot make a novel out of 100 bad desi dates, but I know I can work on my craft, work on the story, edit and refine my words and my story telling. The blog site contacts me, suggests that I set up ads. But I am not doing this for money. If I wanted to make money I’d take classes on how to pitch to magazines.

Each post of approximately 500 words takes me about four hours per post between the writing, editing and publishing.  But this is the first time in a LONG time I have felt that I am being true to myself, fueling a passion, having a purpose. Sure, if I could cure a disease, I would. But that gift was not given to me by God, so I do what I can. I feel, I write, I share.