133. I CAN GOOGLE THE LION

“The Quan Jock date was the most unexceptional, unspectacular, and unsatisfying night of my life," I mutter and tuck the phone under my ear so I can type more freely. “Tell me you’re being dramatic. He really didn’t drill you with questions,” the Banker insists. “I wish. But it was the OPPOSITE of romance!” I blather. “Yes, it seems so,” the Banker replies.

“And for the record, I might be a lot of things, but liar is not one of them, I am not making this up,” I say and cross my legs in my office chair. “What does Quan Jock do?” the Banker asks. "I don't know. Something analytical on Wall Street," I reply. “What I am still curious about is this,” the Banker begins. “Why you didn’t attack back with a list of questions.” “I didn’t care to know those things.” “Well that’s a sign,” the Banker replies and then asks. “Are you typing?” “Yes,” I reply. “I am Googling tonight’s date on People Finder.”

“I'm sorry you’re doing what?” the Banker asks. “The Lion told me he was 44, but I googled him and my online research says he is 46.” “So what is two years?” the Banker asks. “Nothing. I don’t care about the age,” I explain. “I care about the lie.” “And how exactly did you even think he might have given his incorrect age?” “Well..he has a profile on another Indian dating site.” “You’re on two matrimonial sites?” the Banker asks incredulously. “Not really. I don’t use the second one very often.” “You know, if you can search him, he can search you,” the Banker reminds. “Yes but desi men are driving me to these levels and I have nothing to hide," I retort.“This is a little nuts, even for you.” “Well the world is a little nuts,” I reply. “Agreed,” the Banker says.

"Where is your date tonight?" the Banker asks. "I am making the Lion come to the West Side all the way from Queens," I reply. "Good for you," he replies. "Thanks!" “And good luck with the Lion tonight. Happy to see you moving on. And I for one am glad it didn’t work out with Quan Jock. He seemed militant and his job can be outsourced to India in a millisecond. And I can’t see you living in Bangalore.”

Agreed.