Thursday, September 23, 2010

196. DESI DRAMA QUEEN cont.

“Are you ready for the puja?” I ask and push my plate away. “Yes, having Rohit’s mom here is a huge help.” “Does she like hanging out with Rohit and Doggie?” I ask. Rohit and Meera rescued Doggie, I am sure that is why Broke Back’s compassion resonates with her. “Yes! She loves her grand-dog! I felt a little bad that I am not spending time with her, but I haven’t seen you in ages!” Meera says. “Don’t feel bad. I am sure Auntie understands,” I reassure. “Rohit’s a cool dude. Stands to reason his family is, too."

The waiter stops by and says, “Can I get you ladies anything else?” “Nothing for me, thanks,” I reply. To my surprise Meera does something atypical and orders a second glass of wine. When her wine comes she takes a long sip and sets it down. “I have something to tell you,” she says. Something I can’t read and have never seen before flashes through her eyes. Her tone is very, very serious, it at once excites and terrifies me. Either really good or really bad news is about to come.

Because I am a bit of a desi drama queen, I like to worry about things I have no control over and give myself cardiac arrest. Well she can’t be pregnant because she’s drinking. There is the off chance she needs my organizational help, but that would not bring forth such a somber tone. Oh dear, what if she tells me they are moving out of New York City? She is my partner in crime, where will I find another Meera who loves me unconditionally in a town of 8 million? No no, they CANNOT be moving, they JUST bought an apartment. Then dread washes over me and settles in my stomach, it is bad news and I regret not ordering a second glass of wine. “What?” I finally ask.

“Rohit is sick,” Meera says. “What?” I demand. I can feel the start of tears in the corners of my eyes, but I will not allow myself to cry. I need more details and must find a way to be strong for my friend. And why did we waste an hour talking about stupid desi men? She takes a minute to collect herself and says, “He has a tumor.”
OMFG. Please don’t let it be cancer. Cancer is mean. And I hate cancer. I cannot wait around and watch cancer ravage my friend. We have to attack the cancer now! “We don’t know if it is cancer,” Meera explains. I have no ability to disguise my thoughts or feelings so I know she can read the panic spreading across my face. “He has to have surgery and we’re meeting with the doctor next week. Everyone but his mom knows,” she says.

I am atypically stone cold silent. “Rohit told a few of his friends. He didn’t want you to learn about from someone else so he asked me to tell you,” Meera explains. “How long have you known?” I ask. “A couple of weeks,” she says. I shake my head. “You better tell your husband if he does this again, I’m going to kick his ass,” I say, trying to be funny, but choke. “How are you holding up?” I ask.
 She sighs and says, “I’m okay. It’s hard. You spend all your life looking for your ONE TRUE LOVE. You get settled and happy and then…” she says quietly.

I reach across the table and grab her hand, giving it a tight squeeze. Now it is my turn to be a good friend, which means I don’t get to fall apart. I need to be strong and supportive. “You know what? I just decided he will be fine. There is simply no other option for him,” I say and smile, forcing confidence through my tone. I refuse to let my mind wander to worst-case scenarios. We are WAY too young. Meera forces a smile, nods and says, “I know. It’s just…”

She doesn’t have to say anything. I know. Sometimes life is unspeakably unfair.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Life IS unspeakably unfair... and always at the worst times... not that there''s ever a good time to be unfair. It's ironic... this blog. Someone close to me is going through something similar. And it's hard not to think that so many people take life and health for granted. I was holding it together until I read this blog. Well written. Thank you.

101 Bad Desi Dates said...

Dear Anonymous ... Unfair is so correct and yes it seems sometimes just when you are at peace or happy, surprise and not in the good way.

And yes, we do take so much for granted but maybe that is why God shakes up our lives. So sorry to hear that you are in a tough place with someone you love. I used to hope, but sometimes I think hope is misleading, you have to have faith. Faith will guide. Faith in your friend, yourself, God, healthcare. I believe in faith. It is what has gotten me here and what will get me where I am going.

xo,
Desi Girl

Anonymous said...

yes, well written and i love the look of the blog now...(burnt orange is my favorite color)...

i hope rohit knows how lucky he is to have friends like you and a wife like meera...

101 Bad Desi Dates said...

Dear Anonymous ... thanks so much in reference to the color! I got a little feedback that the 60s orange look :) was a little bold and distracting from the reading, so this is my orange compromise, what do you think?

And ha ha ha, let me tell Rohit what you said about Meera and I ... sometimes I think he wants to throw things at us. We can be of one mind sometimes :) ah, thank GOD for girlfriends :)

xo,
Desi Girl

Anonymous said...

based on what i have read about rohit, i am pretty sure he will just have a snarky comment...

i hope he is okay and still giving you gals a tough time...

101 Bad Desi Dates said...

Dear Anonymous .... ha ha ha, Rohit for SURE has some amusing comment! I love that you get him. He is good peeps.

And yes, yes, yes, Rohit is great, and oh yes, he rolls his eyes at us and continues with the jokes. All is good!

xo,
Desi Girl

Anonymous said...

Life is unfair, but a beautifully told story. Hard to hear I'm sure from a close friend. You are a good friend to listen and support, which is I'm sure what Meera needed. Rohit is okay, yes?

101 Bad Desi Dates said...

Dear Anonymous ... Life is UNFAIR. And sometimes when the chips are down you really have to look at the gifts God gave, including or perhaps esp the people who support you in life. It is nice that I "get" Meera and she "gets" me --- there is no apologizing for our weaknesses and there is a celebration of our strengths. I suppose that is what you want in a friend who makes you feel safe.

And yes, Rohit is fine, now.

xo
Desi GIrl