232. THAT SOUND YOU HEAR IS THE CRASH OF DESI GIRL’S COMPUTER

There is something SERIOUSLY wrong with my computer. Over the course of several hellish days my computer has COMPLETELY slowed down, taking three times the normal time to load emails and open word documents. It is in these moments that I wish I was married to the techie-est, desi-est, geekiest, virus-removing Indo-engineer on the planet.

The computer flashes a grizzly grey screen, then a mean blue screen, it takes a long pause like it's thinking, then the hourglass icon appears, but nothing loads. I employ the few rudimentary tech tricks I know like control, alt and delete, and force-turning the computer off. When I turn the computer back on it takes my email almost 15 minutes to open. Clearly it is possessed by little cyber exorcist gremlins.

Normally I am described as talkative, passionate, outgoing, compassionate, impatient, stubborn. But currently the computer makes me want to do bad things. Like dig the hammer out of the toolbox and smash this sucker to smithereens. Or drop the CPU into the bathtub and listen to it sizzle in the water. The stress of this situation is making my eye twitch. I work from home, have a major addiction to Google, rely on email as a main source of work communications --- a non-working computer has landed me in deep shit.

For someone who is normally very organized I have a huge problem. I have not backed up ANYTHING since moving to New York. You would think I would learn from when my computer crashed four years ago and I had to employ the Geek Squad. But no. I don’t have any mailing addresses, emails or phone numbers memorized, much less written down. It is ALL in on that computer. If yahoo deletes me from its system or I lose my mobile phone I am beyond screwed. The only numbers I memorized are: my parents, my brother’s mobile, the Minneapolis office and Meera.

Then just for a brief second, like a sick joke, my email opens this email.

Email from Tapan (from Post 217): Hi Desi Girl … A common family friend conveyed your contact information. I believe you were friends with my sister back in the Minnesota day! It is nice to have fellow alums from the North Star state here in the Big Apple --- I think most of them fled to Callie! Would you be interested in catching up? I do travel for work, but have an NYC reprieve this week. If you have some time this week let me know.

But the virus closes the email before I can reply. Now what? I live in Manhattan and have been disconnected from the entire world.