Wednesday, June 29, 2011

395. MY MOVIE


“Tell me your movie," Life Coach asks in Session Two.

I reply, “It’s springtime and I just moved into my new Manhattan apartment, 2 bedrooms, one and a half-baths, washer and dryer in the apartment and a fully loaded kitchen – stainless steel dishwasher, fridge, stove. Oh and when I say ‘have’ - I mean own. I am still carless in the City, but I don’t flog myself for spending $20 on a cab, I’m worth it.

 I, of course, have permanently lost the pesky 7 pounds that plague me every 14 months. I am skinny enough to wear skinny jeans and not look fat – thanks to Jessica Simpson and her super awesome jeans for girls with curves. It’s a movie – so OF COURSE my hair has learned how to be fabulous all the time – humidity be damned – my hair is sexy, messy and sleek all the same time.

To “make it” – wasn’t an easy ride. I endured and gave up a lot to stick it out in New York, but it was definitely worth every heartbreaking date, every missed subway, every writing class, seminar and critique. Every win and loss shaped my ability to pull a concept statement together, which laid the framework for a novel. A novel that caught the attention of an agent who ‘got’ me. An agent who found the editor who adored the run-on sentences and then grammar schooled me back together again. An agent who found the right nurturing (in New York no less) publishing house who recognized my diamond in the roughness and helped polish out the shiny gem inside me.

But it’s worth it. Really worth it to walk through the stacks of books at Barnes and Noble and see Desi Girl’s Misadventures in Manhattan in hard cover and paperback. And to know that I have a two-book book deal. And the success means more because I fought the fight from within. And that I did it by myself, for myself.”

When I am done sharing the movie – I am struck by my definition of success. My version of success has nothing to do with the married and mortgaged white picket fence Scarsdale life with 2.5 kids, dog and husband that I moved here to New York to obtain. My version of success is about validation, about making it, about being fulfilled, about being okay with me, Desi Girl. Now if I could just do this in real life I’d be all set.

6 comments:

Travel Bug said...

There you go, maybe you dont need a Man, afterall.
He will make an entrance too perhaps if so desired, but until then live your movie, girl.

Sara said...

Wow. That's *so* powerful. To be able to articulate what you want, and then to hear it. Such a great moment. Very interesting that you move to NYC to find a partner, then the city itself becomes more important to you than the partner -- both here, and in your PMFC storyline (and other storylines, like Dr.F).

101 Bad Desi Dates said...

Dear Travel Bug -

Thanks! And when he enters, it would be super fab if he looked a little like Matthew McConaughey there is something his voice, drawl and swagger that puts the go in my giddy-up!!!

xo,
Desi Girl

101 Bad Desi Dates said...

Dear Sara -

I know - it was profound - and Life Coach (as you will see) will push me around my box and then nudge me outside of it.

And In know right - totally thot by now I'd be living "the dream" in Scarsdale. I think the only thing that has been constant is me and being slightly unsinkable :)

xo,
Desi Girl

Travel Bug said...

LOl..who wouldn't like them some Mathew McConaughey, girl?
I usually find the southern drawl a put off (courtesy, University in the deep south)but with the right stats, it can be very charming.
The right man,and you should be open to him will walk in when you are ready.

101 Bad Desi Dates said...

Dear Travel Bug -

Indeed LOL - Matthew is delish that is FOR SURE! And if not Matthew, then yes, I will wait for the right man to come along :) I am patient, or I can be patient if I have to be :)

xo,
Desi Girl