After three days my brother and his family leave for Minnesota. It’s weird now that I am wandering around this small apartment, it feels hugely empty and lonely.
When I think drowning my sorrows and isolation in Sauvignon Blanc is a bad idea, I default to my other avoidance mechanism, napping. (See: I have SOME self-control). I take my phone into the bedroom and turn on the air conditioner. I pull a thin sheet over my body and flip open my phone and read and re-read Town and Country’s text.
What the hell is wrong with me that I cannot shake him or his impact on my life? I mean this a man who has repeatedly told me that he is NOT looking for a relationship. I have responded telling him that I am. And yet this, “I want you, I can’t see you, I’m going to ignore you for two months and come back,” goes on. Because I allow it. Even now, I KNOW KNOW KNOW I should delete these texts and ignore him. But then again, Town and Country does not seem to be someone who can be ignored.
Text to Town and Country: Hey, what’s up?
Immediately he texts back: How are you?
Text to Town and Country: Fine. My brother was here this weekend. How are you?
Text from Town and Country: Family is nice; did you have a good time?
Sigh. It is hard to be annoyed with him when he's being so flippin’ nice.
Text to Town and Country: Yes, we did. How are you?
Text from Town and Country: Very stressed.
Again with his work? I should have just napped.
Text from Town and Country: I have been thinking about you.
Ah yes, now I remember how I get sucked back into this emotional vortex.
Text to Town and Country: Really? Because you blew me off in two months ago.
When several minutes of silence go by, I wonder if I have pissed him off once and for all. I am sure I mentioned that Town and Country does not like to be challenged. To which I wonder why he wants to converse with me because I am all about pushing back. Just ask my parents. And maybe this is good; he’s finally mad at me and will stop reaching out.
Just as I snap the phone shut, Town and Country texts back: I’m sorry for that. Are you free this weekend?
Because I never learn I write back: Sure.