Tuesday, September 27, 2011

460. HE IS NOT NOT NOT MY BOYFRIEND


Ack. The next morning I wake up, brush my teeth and pad around the apartment. Something in my head says “go inspect the laptop” and I do. And remember getting into that small fight with it. As I contemplate what to do I hear my phone beeping.

Text from Town and Country: Can you stop by the house tonight? Want you to see the progress.

Okay. Don’t have to ask me twice. But Meera’s advice comes back to me and so I wait two hours before contacting him with confirmation. During which time I log onto the other computer, yes I have two, and do some online laptop research. I then go into the bedroom and wonder what I should wear. And I remember that return to Macy’s I should take care since I am going downtown.

Text from Desi Girl: Sure, that should work. What time? 7 pm work?
Text from Town and Country: No. Too early. How about 8 pm?
Text from Desi Girl: Sure. Do you want to grab a drink or something to eat?
Text from Town and Country: No. Won’t have time.

Okay. I get it. He is NOT NOT NOT my boyfriend. But something in the way I feel dismissed stings a little more than I would like to admit.

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

Desi girl, I don't like this guy uses you..or well..your time to get a lot of his stuff done.. but then.. finds it so easy to say, "no, don't have time" to just have a bite with you..KNOWING that well.. he's asked you to drop by his house at dinner-ish time.. I hope you're charging him for all the time you spend dropping by his place to help him with his plans.. I just feel like he's using you..and your attraction to him.. he's clearly not dumb.. so you and I both know..that he knows you like him...enough for you to always say "yes" to anything he asks you to do..or help him out with.. I think you need to keep your distance from him for a while.. I just innately feel like he's taking some advantage of you.. you deserve someone who values your company.. so don't even treat him like a friend.. I thinkyou shd. just treat him like a client.. he needs to get the idea that you as a person, your time..is valuable.. I'm so kinda annoyed for you getting a text like that from him.. that's pretty insensitive.. there are better more polite ways to say, "I can't have a bite with you, cuz I have something more urgent to take care of" or whatever.. don't encourage this sort of behaviour with him.. not cool.. you deserve better than that sort of behaviour.

Anonymous said...

I agree with anonymous Desi Girl. You deserve better, even from a "friend".
Milly xx

Anonymous said...

You deserve better from a friend - to whom you are doing a favor and certainly better from a client. A client cannot - I repeat CANNOT demand your dinner-time! You should probably refuse his suggestion for the time. :)

Anonymous said...

For all the care for sound proofing looks like he is building a dungeon for kinky stuff. Stay safe!

Adventurous Ammena said...

Have to agree with everyone else here... maybe it should have been you who said 'No. Don't have the time' :( xxx

101 Bad Desi Dates said...

Dear Anonymous (one) -

Yes - perhaps he uses me - but I allow it right? Sad face :(

But yes he was rude about dinner, bc we end up having dinner anyway - just wait. I dont mean this in any negative way, but I wonder if he has some depression or manic-depressive moments - I mean when he is on, and when he is off - he is two different people.

Clearly he knows I like him - and yes, I am WAY desi - I totally charge him :) and yes it is a total jerk move .... ack! I like all the wrong guys!!!!

xo,
Desi Girl

101 Bad Desi Dates said...

Dear Milly -

Thanks - I know it.But you know, I think I need to think I deserve more in order to get more. Annie get your guns! :)

xo,
Desi Girl

101 Bad Desi Dates said...

Dear Anonymous (two) -

I wish I was strong enough to decline :( ... ack! Bad Desi Girl!!!

It did not occur to me to refuse - but I should have - I wonder if he would have given me the silent treatment or something equally rudey-patudey!

xo,
Desi Girl

101 Bad Desi Dates said...

Dear Anonymous (three) -

LOL - S&M freak? I know - I have wondered it too .....

xo,
Desi Girl

101 Bad Desi Dates said...

Dear Adventurous Ammena -

Agree. Just wish I had you all reminding me of all this - before I agreed to meet him!!!

xo,
Desi Girl

Anonymous said...

Hey Desi girl..this is anonymous 1 - like seriously, I don't think this guy is worth your time at all.. also.. stop being a victim.. or thinking like one.. when it comes to guys.. where's the "Durga" in you?!?! what happened?! He's not "good friend material".. and the whole sound proofing thing with him? he sounds ridiculous.. you need someone more sensitive to your feelings : ) and someone who respects you and treats you properly : ) I don't think your brother would approve of this guy.. cross him off your list! Be strong Babes..be Very strong..especially with him!-A1.

Anonymous said...

and if you think he's even a tiny little bit of a manic depressive..pls for the LOVE of DURGA.. stay AWAY from him!!! he sounds emotionally retarded.. and insensitive.. plus I don't trust guys who know you like them, but don't even acknowledge it casually.. he's a taker! and you're a giver.. it's gotta go both ways.. I don't have a good feeling about this guy anymore..at all.. scared for you.. be strong.. stay away from him. -A1

101 Bad Desi Dates said...

Dear A1 -

I dont know why - when it comes to men I am NOT strong at all. I know these women in NY who date like their are liberating France from Germany. I mean they are just precise. They know what they want and when something is not working they move onto the next.

I have never been like that when is comes to people. I am a giver and I give until I finally feel like I am being taken advantage of and then I snap.

But when it comes to everything else I put my full Durga on and watch the heck out! But I am not strong with this guy! Sad face. Because while I like him ... I never know what the heck is going on!

xo,
Desi Girl

101 Bad Desi Dates said...

Dear A1 -

You are right - he is not sensitive to my feelings - until he hurts them and then freaks out that I am mad at him.

Just wait.

xo,
Desi Girl