Monday, October 10, 2011

469. GUESS WHO IS KICKIN’ IT BACK TO THEIR HOMELAND


“You’re doing what?” I demand into the phone and toss my bag onto the dining table. I have just returned from round one of apartment hunting on the Upper East Side and flop into a dining chair and kick off my shoes. “Daddy and I are going to India,” my mother says.  I have mis-heard her, I think, so I ask again. “You’re doing what?” I demand, only loudly this time, because surely talking louder will fix this. “Going to India. Daddy and I are going to India,” she repeats.

Incredulous.

“Mother,” I begin. I hear her suck in her breath so she knows from my tone I am annoyed. “Yes?” she asks slowly. “Why are you going? Is someone on Dad’s side getting married?” I ask. We didn’t grow up poor by any means, we were not rich either, but it was expensive to for both my parents to attend the weddings of my cousins. And both of my parents had businesses so that was an issue too. So most of the time my dad went to the weddings of his nephews and nieces.  Whereas, my mother has only attended one of her niece’s weddings.  “No, no one is getting married,” she replies.

“Then why are you going? And you better not tell me because of some potential project or something equally stupid,” I bark into the phone. My poor mother. I am sure she had hoped for some nice, sweet, desi daughter who got married and moved to the ‘burbs 10 years ago. Instead she got me. “Daddy wants to meet some people,” my mother replies.

“Mother – he can’t walk properly and you have health problems – the plague still breaks out here and neither one of you have strong immune systems. What if you get dengue?” I demand. “Does your son know about this?” I ask. God help my brother if he knew they were planning to go to India and didn’t tell me. “No,” she says swiftly. “He does not. I am telling you first. We will be careful.” “Mother you are the one who tells me that a person can survive a plane crash but a single leaf can land on them and kill them…” “We will be careful. I will meet with the doctor, we’ll take enough medications, we’ll be fine,” she replies.

Yes, but that is what we thought when Dad went to India and look what happened to him? And he is the healthy one of the two of them. And I am not ready to be an orphan.

6 comments:

amanda said...

Wow... buzz kill! Your parents are old let them have an adventure!

Anonymous said...

since when is going back to the city/country where you grew up a problem? like your mother says - if something has to happen even a leaf can become the cause and even an airplane crash has had survivors. Chill!
And I thought you are a really rational woman with bad luck in men! Disappointed!

101 Bad Desi Dates said...

Dear Amanda -

I don't mean to be a buzz kill - I am just worried about either of them falling ill and all of their doctors and kids are 10,000 miles away. Neither one of them is well, if one were well and one were not, it would not worry me. But he cannot walk - what if he falls down and she cannot help because she weights 90 pounds. They have to pull their suitcases of the conveyor belt. He needs a wheel chair, she sometimes does too.

They are my parents and I dont want them suffering.

xo,
Desi Girl

101 Bad Desi Dates said...

Dear Anonymous -

Sad face! :( .... don't be disappointed. I am only worried about them. And no way, is going to India an issue at all. In the US we have gone ADA crazy but in India, my dad can't walk, it worries me.

It is not like they listen to me :) and yes you are right - I can't stop them and I won't. But I am entitled to love them and worry about them.

A point I make in today's post.

xo,
Desi Girl

Anonymous said...

what I want to tell anyone who worries is - if you can do something about it - go ahead and do that - else stop worrying - worrying does not help anyone - not even yourself - it hurts even your health - do everyone involved(you love) a favor by keeping yourself healthy.
on a side note - if you can be brave enough, you could very well accompany your parents to India.
on another side note - maybe india does not have all the automated and pre-built support systems for ADA - but there is a strong human support system - almost everywhere you can find someone willing to help - trust yourself and have faith. :)

101 Bad Desi Dates said...

Dear Anonymous -

You are so right on the worry. I need to worry about what I cannot control. That should be mantra.

xo
Desi Girl